Afternoon Delight: Kris Clack joins the Celtics

 guest post by the Sports Hayes

Its official, Kris Clack has signed a 10 day contract with the Boston Celtics. Boston Celtics president Danny Ainge confirmed to earlier this afternoon that the rebounding forward Clack would be joining the Celtics 15 years after being drafted.
“We believed that Kris brings to the table what we need to build a contender. We needed help at the forward position with the departure of Jeff Green and we feel Kris will do just fine.” – Danny Ainge

One has to wonder why bringing in the 37 year old at this stage of his career helps, but with the Celtics desperate for help, it makes sense. After all, that was why he was originally drafted right? Former Celtics general manager Chris “Buffoon” Wallace once was quoted to saying: "We were very shocked," said Wallace. "This is someone who was projected to go in the late first round or maybe early in the second. We were very, very shocked and we didn't ask any questions about it."

Know who else is shocked? Clack himself has been coaching 7th grade basketball the past few years when he got the call from Wyc Grousbeck that his contract was being picked up.
“How did they even get my phone number? Oh well, it doesn’t matter.” was his response when I spoke to him earlier.

Welcome aboard Kris!

Clack had legitimate talent as he was the first All-American in Texas Longhorn history and went on to score 1,592 points and haul in 771 rebounds at Texas before being drafted. I also asked him what it will be like playing with Jared Sullinger and Kelly Olynyk, Clack replied “Who?”

Brad Stevens was also perplexed that Clack was signed given they both graduated together in 1999, only Stevens was with Depauw U. “I saw him play in college and he was great, but why in the world would they sign him now? Still, it will be great to coach a superb athlete even if he hasn’t played in 7 years.”

When reached for comment, Gerald Wallace was the most vocal.
“Oh hell no, HELL no. You gotta be kidding me. I’m not saying Danny Ainge is purposely trying to lose to help us get a better draft pick, but c’mon man!” 

Former Texas Longhorn Avery Bradley was asked what it will be like playing with an alumni and he answered. “Kris Clack? I was 8 years old when I saw him play, wow this will be an honor!”

His biggest supporter was the man who drafted him. Through a source, Buffoon himself was quoted
“You know, I never knew why Rick wanted him gone, I was shocked that he slid to us. I was shocked that he let him go, I’m shocked he never played in an NBA game and I’m shocked now that he’s back. This is great news for the Celtics.” 

With Brandon Bass supposedly the next name on the list as the trade deadline nears, a front court of Tyler Zeller, Jared Sullinger and Clack along with Bradley and Smart may not be as bad as people think it could be. Clack was a good rebounder in college so this would certainly help the Celtics up front.

Then again, the 37 year old doesn’t feel that way. When I told him about the possibility of helping on the boards, Clack replied “Boards? I can barely jump two inches off the floorboards! I’m better off sticking to coaching.

When I brought up the contract details, Clack then opened up. “Well, if they’re paying me that much, I better get back in shape!”

At 37, Klack's finally ready to contribute

Unfortunately if he arrives to practice out of shape, he won’t be much good for a few weeks. Still, former Celtic Vitor Faverini told us not to worry. “Kris can take all the time he needs to get in shape. I did!”

Neither Marcus Smart, James Young, Evan Turner or Kelly Olynyk could be reached for comment although the best line came from former Celtics captain Paul Pierce. I texted him that Kris Clack was coming back to the Celtics and he texted back “Who the hell is this?”

All in all this looks like a great move for the Celtics. A 37 year old forward who hasn’t played in 7 years and never spent a minute on an NBA court is perfect for a team heading for the lottery. Pending a physical, it’ll be great to see what Clack can do after 15 years away.

About Afternoon Delight: From time to time, posts an original (most of the time), humorous creation for your delight. View past Afternoon Delight postings.