Will you still need me, will you still feed me, when I'm 65?
Perhaps not, since both are meaningless and the answers for each would be based on projection and hearsay.
Another such piece of information would be a value ranking of NBA players, like the recent list offered by ESPN that rates Boston Celtics Isaiah Thomas highest on the team and 65th in the league.
Now let's be clear - unlike a Sasquatch, Thomas is real. We have many confirmed sightings and hours of video footage.
There is no doubt he's large on the court while small in stature.
But, possibly like a chupacabra, he does have emotions, and Thomas might not be pleased to not be thought of as being in the top 50 of current NBA players.
What makes this list good for not much else than lots of discussion are the many variables that determine a player's worth. For example, one of the tasks of NBA head coaches during the year is determining which lineups work best together.
It is an accepted premise that some players get more out of other players. To give most athletes a stand-alone assessment is a bit short-sighted.
But for Celtics fans who base their prospects of team fortunes on these ratings and see no player in the top 64, take heart.
The Celtics are a many-headed monster. Hard to knock off one in hopes of bringing down the whole.
As good as LeBron James is, his health or lack thereof can swing his team's fortunes by 20-30 games a season.
Let's consider the blessing we have in not having all of our eggs in one basket, and for a coach who knows how to max out value for each one.
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