The REAL competition to watch tonight.

I know a lot of you guys know there is a big Celtics game tonight.  What a lot of you guys don't know is that the real competition is within this matchup.  Allow me to explain...

Thanks to our game preview, you can see that the infamous Joey Crapford and Bidet Salvatore will both be refereeing tonight.  I, of course, could not be happier.  Rather than watching meaningless basketball (as if anyone cares about that shit), finally we will see a true battle of the titans.  Real fans know that the guys in jerseys, the ball and the hoop are just vehicles that drive the real sport of power-reffing.  Sure you can watch dunks and dives and athletic what-have-you's, but the real excitement is in the panting, wheezing and whistling.
Check out this goblin-lookin', tech-givin' motherfucker

I can't wait to see who strikes first.  Will it be a patented Bennett "Oh I didn't see the play cause I was daydreaming of cupcakes." Or will Joey zap a lightning tech at someone, Raiden-style, for offensively giggling?  Once things get going, watch out, cause the one thing you won't see is a genuine enforcement of those stupid rules.  So prepare yourself, get your Crawford or Salvatore jersey out and your whistle ready, because only one man-in-gray will leave the garden tonight with the satisfied feeling of leaving his indelible mark on the game.
WHAT are you DOING?!
ARF ARF grrrr ARF!

I mean, I know we are only in Round 1 of the play-offs, but man oh man, JC and BS! It's just like the Bible, only a little more epic! Believe me, the miracles are coming, well they will be when these two clowns actually call a fair game.