I Abhor Chris Wallace

The dumbest person in this picture is 2nd to the right

Everyone on Celticslife knows my hatred for Chris Wallace.  I loathe him.  I detest him.  Never before in the history of basketball has one man who never laced up sneakers and took the court had such an impact on my beloved Celtics.  I've been tempted to purchase the domain name "www.chriswallacesucks.com" and point it to celticslife.

We all know he's a Buffoon.  That's been established and there's not much of a reason to rehash all of his transactions and commentary associated with them.  For that, read the other article.

For this, I'm overwhelmed by colors:

I see Orange and Blue.  Those are the colors of the Denver Nuggets, the team Carmelo Anthony plays for.  If the Buffoon had waited to claim Denver's draft choice instead of getting a 3rd pick in the weak 2001 draft, we may have seen Carmelo in a Boston uniform.  Or Chris Bosh.  Or Dwyane Wade.  In other words, our championship window right now would be extended.  Maybe that juggernaut in Miami wouldn't have been formed.

I see Brown.  For Kedrick Brown.

I see Red.  Those are the colors of the Hawks uniforms, the team Joe Johnson plays for.  If the reports are true and Phoenix wanted Kedrick Brown for Rodney Rogers and Tony Delk during that 2002 season, why did we insist on giving up Johnson, who clearly showed he was ahead of Brown.

I see Silver and Gray.  That's the color of hair covering his pea-sized brain.

I see Purple and Yellow.  Those are the colors of our biggest enemy.  The one he helped make contenders again.  Anyone else remember what it was like from November of 2007 until Feb 1st of 2008?  There were the Pistons who were good and the whole Western Conference was on par.  The Flakers were in the middle of the pack as a 4 or 5 seed.  Boston wiped the floor with them the 2 times they played that year prior to the Gasol trade.

I mean did you learn anything in your 10 years with the Celtics from Red Auerbach regarding the dislike of Los Angeles?  Is it safe to say that every Celtics fan would be able to stomach the C's losing this past June a hell of a lot more had it been to the Spurs, Suns or anyone but LA?  And why on earth do you give a Top 10 player in the league to a team within your own conference?  Who does that?

I see Gold.  That's the color of the championship trophy that should be in the Celtics' possession this summer.

I see Green and White.  That should be the color of the banner being raised to the rafters in Boston this season.

But it won't be raised.  And the Celtics finished second, which for us die-hards we know, is as good as finishing last.  Thanks again Chris Wallace for being an imbecile, and hurting the Celtics for as long as you have.

For more Chris Wallace bashing please see:

Public Enemy #1 
How Can He Mess Up the Season?
How Dumb is Chris Wallace?