The Dirty Prince

Back when I wrote the article about Lebron James I was already thinking about Dwight Howard if we advanced the series against Cleveland. For a couple of days I almost started to write another similar piece about Howard but I decided not to do so. Some people reacted in a way I didn't fully expect when I simply stated some facts about James. After what happened last night I cannot help but letting some thoughts about how the NBA cheats and manipulates the game in some ways. Thankfully, sometimes there is sports karma and things that not even Stern can control, such as the fact that the Celtics are one win away from the NBA finals. Somewhere in his house, the league president must have been trembling in fear by the prospect of having to give the NBA championship to the city of Boston again. We all know he doesn't like the Celtics. It's hard to remember when it was the last time we held an All Star Game and it is very easy to acknowledge that it is in the interest of the league that Cleveland and Orlando arrived to the Conference Finals. Stern wanted this, and he ultimately wanted a Cavs-Lakers finals, which clearly isn't going to happen.

Mr Stern's love for the business and the money generated by it is bigger than his clear hate on our team. It's not only that he doesn't feel special sympathy for Boston, it's just that he needs new ways to generate more money. Let's face it: the Celtics as they are built now are meant to last not many years. Business-wise it is not a good investment. He needs new stars with rising games to exploit them and use them for the long term. I guess you can't be Stern's toy, Sheed. Get over it, you are too old and you speak the truth way too often. Stern likes to mold his stars by another standards, he likes to copy a format that worked in the past and he uses sensational players to fulfill his investments. In the 90's there were two major stars in the league: Michael Jordan and Shaquille O'Neal. Stern is a firm believer of cloning, and he found the perfect players to continue with the big money machine: Dwight would be the new Shaq and Lebron was supposed to be the new Mike.

Once found the players it was a matter of making their lives easier in the game. Most of the things we commented on the Lebron article can be applied to Dwight. There are just some details that differ, but the general idea is there:

1. Dwight Howard is a copy of Shaquille O'Neal. The problem is that he is not as dominant as Shaq was. He is not so good offensively and his mental toughness is the equivalent to a first grade student. He is a force of nature and he is also a very poor free throw shooter but nothing that the referees cannot work on. Which takes us to the next point:


2. He gets away with murder all the time and he is never ejected. Whereas Lebron never fouls out and travels all the time, Dwight is simply a dirty player. He uses his elbows here and then and the referees never call a foul on him. Check youtube and click "Howard elbow". There is a particular play with Gasol in which he hits the Laker on the face and it is the Spaniard who gets the T...does it ring any bells? He had a flagrant foul on Pierce earlier in the series and wasn't even considered a special foul. He can hit but he can't get it. I can imagine a phone call from Stern to the referees after game 1 when Sheed showed Dwight how being hard and sportsman are not a contradiction. The Celtics completely dominated Dwight without being dirty...after watching the rest of the games of this series you can be sure Sheed won't be allowed to even touch Howard's jersey... The only chance we have is activating Scalabrine or making Shelden hit him hard and get suspended for next game. In the meantime Dwight elbows Baby, throws down Pierce, hits Garnett...the "Stern show for the grotesque money quest" continues

3. As with Lebron, Dwight is indeed a walking steroid. I know I would probably get punished with some harsh comments here, but take a look at his shoulders and tell me if he gets those with physical exercise and a dish of rice with fish. Just no.

4. He is not a role model either. After game 4 he thanked God for not getting swept and after game 5 he said he didn't intend to hurt Davis. Who can believe that? Check the images, check the vids and let me know if this is a model for young players that are learning about the game. What do you teach them, that you can travel (Lebron) and use your elbows whenever you want? Yes, very nice. Dwight, ever heard of the word hypocrisy?

5. Speaking about elbows. That's another coincidence in this year's playoffs: From "Lebron and the everhurting elbow" to "Dwight and the everhurting others elbow"...very original, Mr Stern. The two new blockbuster movies for this summer in the NBA school of the fake cinema

6. Dwight disrespects other players too. How can you steal Shaq's nickname, weren't you friends? Ah, sorry! I forgot it's very ethical to cheap shot your friends too (go and ask poor Baby Davis). Be original and grow up, Dwight...Superman? How about Superfake, Supergirl, or Superelbow? You will never be anything close to a hero until you prove you can win without help from the league. Accept it and deal with it. And I forgot: don't smile, it is disrespectful to everybody who wants to see true basketball. Until you actually win something stop smiling and play some clean basketball...do you know how to?

Let's face it, we are very good and we are about to defeat David Stern twice this playoffs. We beat the King that never was and now we are about to beat the Dirty Prince too. What I suggest is keeping on with our style and philosophy and though I would really like some revenge on Howard from Sheed or whomever, we should all follow Dwight's religious words and be ethical too. We will win without cheap shots, fake refs, low IQ commercial at halftime and without a smile on our faces until the end when we will all laugh at this poor and mediocre attempt to stop the true TEAMS of this league.

Go Celtics, let's beat them tomorrow!