Just kidding, everyone with more than 16 working brain cells would have guessed it - it's Gerald Wallace.
Simmons' annual worst contracts list is always really well done, and this year was no different. Guy is a complete NBA nerd, and that nerdiness shines through in the best possible way when it comes to ripping the GMs that gave out these deals.
The whole thing is worth a read, but here's what The Sports Guy had to say about our beloved Crash.
I received the following Wallace-related e-mails just in the past month …
Isaac in Mesquite, Texas: “As a Brooklyn Nets fan, I’m at the point where I can’t even look at Damian Lillard without getting pissed off.”
Frank in Oswego: “When Adam Silver takes over, my biggest fear is that he’s going to belatedly overrule the Wallace/Lillard trade and declare it was unfairly one-sided. That can’t happen, correct?”
Eric in Springfield, Massachusetts: “Instead of a jersey number, could the Celtics convince Wallace to wear all the first-rounders we got in that trade on his jersey? I want to be constantly reminded that we have those picks every time I’m forced to watch him play basketball.”
Jared in Boston: “My roommate is a huge Celtics fan. He just realized that he turns 21 on the day Gerald Wallace’s contract expires and said, ‘That’s definitely the day I die of alcohol poisoning.’”
LOVE the idea Eric in Springfield had. Just have his jersey read "2014, 2016, 2018, right to swap in 2017". Little wordy, but it would actually cause Wallace sightings to bring a smile to Celtics fans' faces.
As for why Wallace is ranked #2 - well, isn't it obvious? Guy is a complete black hole offensively, averaging 4.8 points, 3.5 rebounds, 2.5 assists and 1.2 steals per game in 23.7 minutes. He turns the ball over at the highest rate in the NBA (27.3% of all possessions), shoots the ball less than any other player in the league (5.6 FGA per-36 minutes), and his PER is the 4th worst of any player with at least 1,200 minutes played this year (9.9).
And what does he get for being one of the worst rotation guys in the NBA? How about $10.1 million this season, $10.1 million next season, and $10.1 million in 2015-16. Yikes.
(Note: If an NBA GM is reading this, I'm just kidding. Wallace is the perfect guy to put you over the top in the post-season. He plays hard, is amazingly unselfish on the floor, guards three positions, and his $10 million salary pays for itself with his uncanny ability to lift a team after tough losses. If you play your cards right, you may be able to land this gem of a man in time for your post-season run.)
Some other interesting names on Simmons' list.
#1 Amar'e - duh.
#6 Kobe - You mean giving a 35-year-old coming off an achilles tear a 2-year, $48 million extension isn't a good thing? What??!!
#12 Perk - Happy Perk got paid by OKC before anyone realized the ACL tear ended his days as a competent NBA player. He deserved that money for the work he did here.
Honorable Mentions - Kris Humphries, Keith Bogans..both in the "expiring atrocities" category.
Surprisingly not mentioned - Jeff Green.
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For more of my articles, click here Michael Dyer 2/18/2014 06:51:00 PM Tweet Edit